You: hi
    Stranger: hey
    You: wanna cyber
    Stranger: Depends are you a girl? ;)
    You: ya
    Stranger: And okay then, you start?
    You: i come into ur bedroom
    You: and ur sleeping
    You: and i crawl under your blanket
    Stranger: I'm still asleep
    You: u feel me pulling down ur pants
    You: and u wake up and smile
    Stranger: I kiss you gently, still sleepy
    You: then i smile and open the scissors around your dick and snap them closed
    You: cutting off your penis
    Stranger: wait
    You: THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR CHEATING ON ME
    Stranger: Then what...?
    You: I HATE YOU
    Stranger: I didn't cheat
    You: you bleed to death in your bed
    Stranger: i didn't cheat on you. lets restart ok
    You: nobody ever knows what happened
    You: i flee to mexico with your Mercedes
    You: the end
    Stranger: I have a mercedes?
    You: not anymore faggot
    Your conversation partner has disconnected.

do you ever just rub your eyes so hard that you just start entering some other fucking galaxy of swirls and patterns 

(Source: ytoob, via awesomephilia)

bmoburns:

preteenager:

HOW DOES POPCORN EVEN DO THAT THING

HERE I SHOW YOU THE THING

image

(via ramblingsofanangryirishman)